Spreading the word about the value of quiet, sensitive people.
by Barbara Markway, Ph.D., and Greg Markway, Ph.D.
The basic feeling of shyness is universal and over the years evolved
into a mechanism used to help individuals cope
Shyness is a common but little understood emotion. Everyone has felt
ambivalent or self-conscious in new social situations.
What can you do if you're a parent of a quiet
child and you learn that he or she is being teased or bullied? Here are some
guidelines that may help:
▪ Let your child know she should tell you if
someone is bothering her at school. Sometimes kids are afraid to let someone
know they’re being bullied for fear of retaliation. Also, they may feel ashamed
and embarrassed.
▪ Reassure your child that you will work with
him to improve the situation. It’s not his fault, and it’s not going to
continue forever.
▪ Help your child project an image of
confidence. Tell her that holding her head up high and making eye-contact will
make her look less appealing to a bully.
▪ Tell your child to look for opportunities to
be nice to the bully. For example, approach her first and ask her what she did
over the weekend.
▪ Encourage your child to “hang out” with
others. Kids are often bullied when they are by themselves. Bullies are less
likely to approach a group of kids.
▪ Do not instruct your child to fight the bully.
Fighting back not only satisfies the bully, it can also be dangerous.
If these tips don’t help improve the situation,
talk with school personnel and enlist their help. Often times they’re not aware
of the situation. Once they know what’s going on, they can observe more closely
and intervene when necessary.
It’s important for a child’s growth not to take away the fact that
some children simply prefer listening to talking and reading to socializing.
Become aware and start to appreciate the idea that children should
not be punished for appearing being shy.
Work Cited
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shyness-is-nice/201205/the-sting-shyness-1
